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The Current Event Song 3/26/08
(It Doesn’t Matter To Me)
It has been reported by researchers at the New England Historic Society that Barack Obama is a distant cousin of actor Brad Pitt. And Hillary Rodham Clinton is related to Pitt’s girlfriend Angelina Jolie. And…. John McCain is related to Laura Bush. So let’s all say “Who cares!” together.
Well, we have relation, running for our nation!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
It seems America’s Next Top Model is growing tired of Tyra Banks personality conflicts. Yep, Tyra isn't getting along with photo shoot director Jay Manuel, and her days on the show could be numbered. Little miss attitude, barely interacts with the contestants and only wants to show up on judging day.
Well, we give 10 yanks to Tyra Banks!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
Viagra still popular after 10 years! That’s right, Viagra has kept it up for ten years now. It took 100 years for Coca-Cola to be the most recognized logo in the world, and Viagra has replaced that in 5 years! Still, don’t forget to consult your doctor if you have an erection lasting more 4 hours!
Well, better check that heart, before you start!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
The Current Event Song 3/18/08
(It Doesn’t Matter To Me)
A Kansas woman sits on a toilet for 2 Years! Yep, sat on it so long that she was stuck to the seat by the time her boy friend called police. The sheriff said, “her muscles had atrophied and she didn’t want to leave.” She was hospitalized and now they are determining if any charges are to be filed on her boyfriend.
Well, you parked that meat, 2 years on a seat!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
On a downhill slide, Michael Jackson is in danger of losing his Neverland Ranch in California! That’s right, it’s going up on public auction due to millions in outstanding loans! Ah, maybe it’s for the best
Well, Neverland may turn to sand!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
A Mexican man once weighing in at 1,235lbs had his romance interrupted by an accident. Manuel Uribe was fork-lifted from his bed to a flatbed pick-up truck to haul himself and his bed to a party! He was halfway there when one of the post holding a sun-shielding tarp over his bed hit an overpass. His blood pressure dropped so much that he was hospitalized. He hopes to go out with his girlfriend in June.
Well, he’ll have to wait, till June for a date!
While this might matter to someone
It doesn’t matter to me
The Current Event Song 2/26/08
(It Doesn’t Matter To Me)
Clinton said "every Democrat should be outraged" at two "false" mailers that Obama sent to voters in Ohio. I don’t know about The Clintons but I receive my share of false mailings too, like "You have been approved!" and "You are already a winner!"
Well, you can’t believe everything you read!
While it might matter to someone,
It doesn’t matter to me
Come on now, This has been going on long enough!
Feds may probe Clemens over testimony! Congress may ask Justice Dept. to probe whether Roger Clemens made false statements. Now the Feds are getting into it! Choke, Choke! This is all over steroids, geez!
Well, there aint no steroids in baseball!
While it might matter to someone,
It doesn’t matter to me
Get this, Valerie Bertinelli cheated on Eddie Van Halen. Yes it’s true, sweet little innocent Valerie. That what she told oprah that she was no angel either. It must have been after her Jenny Craig weight loss program. Apparently they are arguing about who cheated first!
Well, there’s infidels in hollywood!
While it might matter to someone,
It doesn’t matter to me
The Current Event Song 2/18/08
(It Doesn’t Matter To Me)
In Baseball – America’s favorite pastime was tainted last week when baseball star player Roger Clemens was in courts defending himself against accusations of steroid use.
Well, there aint no steroids in baseball!
While it might matter to someone,
It doesn’t matter to me
The president in Cuba Fidel Castro, has resigned his presidency today and will not accept a new term when parliament meets this Sunday
Well, no more Castro in Cuba!
While it might matter to someone,
it doesn’t matter to me
Get this, Scientists find ‘Devil Toad’ fossil. A frog the size of a bowling ball, with heavy armor and teeth, lived among dinosaurs millions of years ago
Well, they dug up a frog shaped fossil!
While it might matter to someone,
it doesn’t matter to me
